Tuesday, February 13, 2007
It's been blessedly quiet here on the chemo ward. We've had some minor drama with fluid retention, nausea, and the need for another blood transfusion, but those all pale in light of the fact that I can think and type! I'm even able to do some crafting, which is a blessing for someone like me who hates idle hands.
As always, there is plenty of time to think and reflect. My oldest daughter and I were out on a "hot date" the other night (Starbucks and Target) when she asked me, "Mom, how do you do it all--take care of us, do the schooling, and do chemo??".
I thought for a moment and the answer came to me. "Grace". I told here that when she was a (fairly easy) baby, I felt overwhelmed with my day to day tasks of taking care of her. I can only imagine what I could accomplish now with only one baby in the house--but now I have Four Kid Grace and Sarcoma grace as well, so my perspective is vastly different.
I also told her that I don't do it all. The floors and the bathrooms take a backseat to schooling and a rest break for mom, and that's just how it is right now.
This brought me to why I'm so uncomfortable when I'm told by others that I'm a "supermom" or an "inspiration". I'm just doing my job. One of the things that I loved about the "Attitude" post was that it noted that everyone is fighting their own battles. You don't have to downplay yours just because mine looks a bit grimmer at the moment. Instead, we need to encourage one another...and I want to know what people I love are struggling with because then I can pray and encourage them as well.
Because His grace is always sufficient...for every battle we face, large or small.
As always, there is plenty of time to think and reflect. My oldest daughter and I were out on a "hot date" the other night (Starbucks and Target) when she asked me, "Mom, how do you do it all--take care of us, do the schooling, and do chemo??".
I thought for a moment and the answer came to me. "Grace". I told here that when she was a (fairly easy) baby, I felt overwhelmed with my day to day tasks of taking care of her. I can only imagine what I could accomplish now with only one baby in the house--but now I have Four Kid Grace and Sarcoma grace as well, so my perspective is vastly different.
I also told her that I don't do it all. The floors and the bathrooms take a backseat to schooling and a rest break for mom, and that's just how it is right now.
This brought me to why I'm so uncomfortable when I'm told by others that I'm a "supermom" or an "inspiration". I'm just doing my job. One of the things that I loved about the "Attitude" post was that it noted that everyone is fighting their own battles. You don't have to downplay yours just because mine looks a bit grimmer at the moment. Instead, we need to encourage one another...and I want to know what people I love are struggling with because then I can pray and encourage them as well.
Because His grace is always sufficient...for every battle we face, large or small.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Having a bad hair day?
I've been sent this by two friends now. With round four of chemo looming, it's a good excuse to smile. Hope you smile, too!
Attitude
There once was a woman who woke up one morning,looked in the mirror,and noticed she had only three hairs on her head.Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today?"So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up,looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head."H-M-M," she said,"I think I'll part my hair down the middle today?"So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up,looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head."Well," she said,"today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail."So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up,looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head."YEA!" she exclaimed,"I don't have to fix my hair today!"
Attitude is everything.
Be kinder than necessary,for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
Love generously,Care deeply,Speak kindly.
Leave the rest to God
Labels: Cancer
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
The number of true friends I have been blessed with in my adult life is something that continuously blows me out of the water.
My late childhood and most of my teen years were spent more or less friendless--we moved so much that by the time I was in high school, I had developed so many defense mechanisms that it was impossible for me to make a close friend. Most of the time I simply saw myself as an unlikeable person.
After I was saved (early freshman year), God tore down the walls and I began to make friends...including my best friend, the man who would become my husband.
I have friends I am related to (my sisters), one friend who is Jonathan to my David, a true sister of the heart, another who is a close second if only we had more time and lived closer, a small circle of women in Phoenix that I was blessed to be close to, and an amazing circle of email friends, many of which I've been blessed to meet over the years. In the last few months, they've stuck by me through all of the craziness.
One thing I've also learned is that close friendship is hard to maintain over distances. I've come to appreciate a friendship quality that I call "low maintenance" and that my friend Heather simply calls, "being pragmatic".
Lucky for me, both she and my friend Meredith are pragmatic. When I moved away, they realized that life is busy, especially for a mom with an expanding brood. Despite once being pretty tight, my communication with Heather dropped to exchanging Christmas cards. Meredith, while busy with growing a thriving business, could always be counted on to drop her life for a day and come catch up with me during visits to Florida. Neither saw it as "personal" or a lack of love on my part that I couldn't be a better "day to day" friend.
Now I'm home...and that "pragmatic" quality that the three of us share means that despite being in a new place, I have friends! I got to have a girls day out with Heather this weekend, and if you had seen us chattering away at the coffee shop, you'd never know it had been twelve years since our last face-to-face meeting. Meredith has faithfully visited me in the hospital and came down to spend the day with us today, too. Both have made me feel less lonely--let's face it, a girl needs girlfriends!
I'm praying that I learn from them, too, to be "pragmatic" with the now far-away friends who meant so much to me in Phoenix. They're too special to let fall by the wayside, and I can't imagine having them fall away completely.
My late childhood and most of my teen years were spent more or less friendless--we moved so much that by the time I was in high school, I had developed so many defense mechanisms that it was impossible for me to make a close friend. Most of the time I simply saw myself as an unlikeable person.
After I was saved (early freshman year), God tore down the walls and I began to make friends...including my best friend, the man who would become my husband.
I have friends I am related to (my sisters), one friend who is Jonathan to my David, a true sister of the heart, another who is a close second if only we had more time and lived closer, a small circle of women in Phoenix that I was blessed to be close to, and an amazing circle of email friends, many of which I've been blessed to meet over the years. In the last few months, they've stuck by me through all of the craziness.
One thing I've also learned is that close friendship is hard to maintain over distances. I've come to appreciate a friendship quality that I call "low maintenance" and that my friend Heather simply calls, "being pragmatic".
Lucky for me, both she and my friend Meredith are pragmatic. When I moved away, they realized that life is busy, especially for a mom with an expanding brood. Despite once being pretty tight, my communication with Heather dropped to exchanging Christmas cards. Meredith, while busy with growing a thriving business, could always be counted on to drop her life for a day and come catch up with me during visits to Florida. Neither saw it as "personal" or a lack of love on my part that I couldn't be a better "day to day" friend.
Now I'm home...and that "pragmatic" quality that the three of us share means that despite being in a new place, I have friends! I got to have a girls day out with Heather this weekend, and if you had seen us chattering away at the coffee shop, you'd never know it had been twelve years since our last face-to-face meeting. Meredith has faithfully visited me in the hospital and came down to spend the day with us today, too. Both have made me feel less lonely--let's face it, a girl needs girlfriends!
I'm praying that I learn from them, too, to be "pragmatic" with the now far-away friends who meant so much to me in Phoenix. They're too special to let fall by the wayside, and I can't imagine having them fall away completely.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Like people didn't know I was weird??
My friend Amy Wallace tagged me today to play "Six Weird Things About Me." Then Sally double tagged me, so I'm giving it a shot in lieu of some of the other posts percolating in my head right now.
1. I love to cook and I hate to throw food away. In fact I get a perverse kick out of creative recycling of leftovers. So far this week, baked apples turned into apple-oatmeal pancakes, and mashed potatoes into potato-asparagus soup. Good thing my kids are (for the most part) cheerful eaters!
2. I hate going to restaurants and paying to eat things like spaghetti that I make all the time anyway! Consequently, we eat out mostly at ethnic restaurants like Japanese and Thai. With our budget right now, we're mostly not eating out!
3. I get weird housekeeping pet peeves. In my last house having the back (glass sliding door) smudged up made me crazy. So, with four kids home all the time, I spent a lot of time cleaning it. So far in this house, keeping up takes so much energy that I haven't developed one yet!
4. One of my favorite lines as a mom is, "We speak standard English in this house". I'm working on eliminating the answer "Yeah?" from my children's vocabulary.
5. No matter how hot it is, I have to sleep with a comforter on the bed. Sheets alone don't have enough "weight" to them for me to relax.
6. I secretly develop crackpot theories. My latest is that no one but me in my house knows how to shut doors, drawers, or closets (especially the linen closet at the top of the stairs). I've also theorized that if I die, my children will walk around with six-inch fingernails and earwax blooming out of their heads in sticky clouds (gross, I know) and slowly go deaf.
1. I love to cook and I hate to throw food away. In fact I get a perverse kick out of creative recycling of leftovers. So far this week, baked apples turned into apple-oatmeal pancakes, and mashed potatoes into potato-asparagus soup. Good thing my kids are (for the most part) cheerful eaters!
2. I hate going to restaurants and paying to eat things like spaghetti that I make all the time anyway! Consequently, we eat out mostly at ethnic restaurants like Japanese and Thai. With our budget right now, we're mostly not eating out!
3. I get weird housekeeping pet peeves. In my last house having the back (glass sliding door) smudged up made me crazy. So, with four kids home all the time, I spent a lot of time cleaning it. So far in this house, keeping up takes so much energy that I haven't developed one yet!
4. One of my favorite lines as a mom is, "We speak standard English in this house". I'm working on eliminating the answer "Yeah?" from my children's vocabulary.
5. No matter how hot it is, I have to sleep with a comforter on the bed. Sheets alone don't have enough "weight" to them for me to relax.
6. I secretly develop crackpot theories. My latest is that no one but me in my house knows how to shut doors, drawers, or closets (especially the linen closet at the top of the stairs). I've also theorized that if I die, my children will walk around with six-inch fingernails and earwax blooming out of their heads in sticky clouds (gross, I know) and slowly go deaf.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
What was that? Ah yes, it goeth before a fall...
I literally fell on my face Wednesday, leading to a series of events leading to a blood transfusion.
While it had nothing to do with "overdoing", a frustrating setback--not to mention shooting every one's day to pieces.
Still, it wasn't just "chance" that my sister's mother-in-law had already scheduled to bring dinner--and she filled my fridge and freezer, too, God bless her. Something to be thankful for in the midst of the storm.
Also, if you can, PLEASE give blood. I've had to receive it twice now and it gives you a deeper appreciation of just how powerful life blood is.
While it had nothing to do with "overdoing", a frustrating setback--not to mention shooting every one's day to pieces.
Still, it wasn't just "chance" that my sister's mother-in-law had already scheduled to bring dinner--and she filled my fridge and freezer, too, God bless her. Something to be thankful for in the midst of the storm.
Also, if you can, PLEASE give blood. I've had to receive it twice now and it gives you a deeper appreciation of just how powerful life blood is.
Name:
