Sunday, April 08, 2007
It is finished
I was released from my last day of chemotherapy on Good Friday. One of my favorite nurses, Janelle, was taking care of me that day. She is a believer, and her mother is a cancer survivor who now directs an oncology center in Chatanooga, TN.
She was telling me that her mother's center recently installed a large brass bell in the front lobby, and whenever someone finished with chemo, they got to ring the bell, both to declare their "graduation" and as an encouragment to others.
Wow, I thought, compared to that, walking out of Moffitt was kind of anti-climactic. (Although my kiddos and in-laws greeted me with beautiful banners and my sister sent gorgeous roses) And while I think I would like a celebration of some sort when I'm feeling better (there is definitely another transfusion in my very close future)--mostly to celebrate my amazing support team in "real time" and on the internet--I couldn't help thinking.
How typical of us as people for us to want us to recognize our suffering and struggles. And we ALL have suffering and struggles...maybe not cancer, but we all walk those paths. But to reflect on in on Good Friday, yes, I had been miserable, but not to the point of shedding blood. Yes, it was an awful round, but I was not alone; my Jesus suffered alone and he died for me and for the sin of the entirety of mankind who would by grace believe. I was happy to get out, but I did feel rather small and melancholy as I reflected on my Savior's death, as is more than appropriate for Good Friday.
Lord, let my life be the bell that rings not my own sufferings and joys, but simply the music and truth of who you are. Thank you for your choice to suffer for that which you did not deserve and that which I so highly did.
She was telling me that her mother's center recently installed a large brass bell in the front lobby, and whenever someone finished with chemo, they got to ring the bell, both to declare their "graduation" and as an encouragment to others.
Wow, I thought, compared to that, walking out of Moffitt was kind of anti-climactic. (Although my kiddos and in-laws greeted me with beautiful banners and my sister sent gorgeous roses) And while I think I would like a celebration of some sort when I'm feeling better (there is definitely another transfusion in my very close future)--mostly to celebrate my amazing support team in "real time" and on the internet--I couldn't help thinking.
How typical of us as people for us to want us to recognize our suffering and struggles. And we ALL have suffering and struggles...maybe not cancer, but we all walk those paths. But to reflect on in on Good Friday, yes, I had been miserable, but not to the point of shedding blood. Yes, it was an awful round, but I was not alone; my Jesus suffered alone and he died for me and for the sin of the entirety of mankind who would by grace believe. I was happy to get out, but I did feel rather small and melancholy as I reflected on my Savior's death, as is more than appropriate for Good Friday.
Lord, let my life be the bell that rings not my own sufferings and joys, but simply the music and truth of who you are. Thank you for your choice to suffer for that which you did not deserve and that which I so highly did.
Labels: chemotherapy, Reflections
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5 Comments:
Wow. Such a beautiful post, Heather. I'm praying for you!
I've tried to leave a message several times but the system wouldn't let me, so I am tryng again. I don't know if eventually they will all show up or not.
Anyway, I wanted to say I am so happy for you. I praise God for getting you through this time in your life. I think it is wonderful it all coincided with Good Friday and Easter Sunday. They both represent the new life we have in Him because of His resurrection. What a wonderful way to end this saga of chemo and all that goes with it. While you may need a transfusion soon, the chemo is over! Praise God! Praise God for your dh,kids, sisters, and mom. In my line of work, I have seen so many families not standing by each other during their walk through their cancer and treatment. Even the little kids are left to fight this alone at times. I praise God you had such a strong network to walk with you. You have fought a courageous fight and have shown others your love for our Lord and Saviour while you did it. I can only say I'm sure there will be many touched by your love for God during this. And that alone is a testimony to our wonderul Saviour. You continue to be in my prayers and thoughts. I love you dearly my friend. God Bless you and your whole family. Tell them all I love them. Love always TT
Oh I forgot to add you can find me here on this blog site as "Aunt Mommies thoughts. Love you bunches, TT
Heather,
We continue to lift you up in prayer here. Looking forward to many celebrations of clean scans in the years to come.
Love you,
Laurie
Amen.
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